By Beth Carter
Apollo buried his angular nose in Athena’s soft curls and sighed.
“What scent is that? Lilac? Honeysuckle? Rose?” He inhaled again.
Athena shook her long locks and cocked her head toward the yellow bottle.
“It’s a secret formula apparently made from Norwegian wildflowers. The shampoo is magical. That’s all I can tell you.”
Apollo grunted. “Why?”
“Zeus told me we’d be mere bedrock if—”
“Rubbish. He exaggerates. Don’t believe those silly mythological tales.”
Apollo drew a small heart where he planned to etch their initials. Unable to resist, he again smelled Athena’s fragrant hair. They both turned to stone.
Try it! Please comment here then post your story at http://rochellewisofffields.wordpress.com/2013/01/30/1-february-2013/
Intriguing. Curious to understand more.
ReplyDeleteThanks, storiedimpressions. Late last night, I changed the title from "Shampoo" to "Temptation." That help explains the story, I think. Basically, Athena may enjoy the amazing fragrance of the magical shampoo IF she and Apollo don't overindulge. If they do...
DeleteI love the idea of magical shampoo that turns you to stone! also, very clever how you incorporated the heart into this story. Lovely writing.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for your nice comments, EL Appleby. I try to incorporate as many prompt pieces as I can.
DeleteIt's interesting how different the story ideas are that come from these photo prompts. I never would have come up with this!
ReplyDeleteI know, Sharon. It's crazy how everyone's mind works--and beautiful--and chilling and, and, and.
DeleteI'm glad to see I'm not the only one who came up with a mythological idea! The only thing I would change is: Artemis is Apollo's twin sister - perhaps you meant Apollo? Otherwise, I loved the story, especially the part of "Don't believe such foolish mythological nonsense."
ReplyDeleteSarah, thanks for pointing that out! I changed Artemis to Apollo (the God I had planned to use to begin with and switched last minute). I mixed up my Greek Gods! It has been a loooong time since that mythology class in high school.
DeleteThanks for your comments and I'm heading over to yours!
Intriguing story. I like the Greek mythology angle. I'm here: http://readinpleasure.wordpress.com/2013/02/01/fridayfictioneers-janus
ReplyDeleteThanks, Readingpleasure. I'll read yours.
DeleteThat was a lovely Greek tragedy; I like the idea of a magical shampoo. Well done.
ReplyDeleteYes, my first attempt at a Greek tragedy. Thank you, Sandra.
DeleteMaybe I'll have a magical shampoo in my next childten's book!
I see it's not only people who don't listen. Also very Garden-of-Eden-like. I like your descriptions, too.
ReplyDeletejanet
Thank you, Janet. The Garden of Eden was in the back of my mind when I wrote this.
DeleteI hope the magical shampoo in your children's story doesn't change people to stone. Good story--this prompt really does lend itself to retelling the adventures of mythological gods.
ReplyDeleteOh, no. I wouldn't scare the little ones. I agree, it's a great prompt for those attractive, mythical Greek gods. Thanks.
DeleteI really enjoyed this, and just like I used to tell ma when I was a little boy - shampoo can be the death of you!
ReplyDeleteHaha, t. And did your mom buy that? Thanks for stopping by.
DeleteVery clever, and well developed.
ReplyDeleteSeems Greek mythology is all the rage these days.
Did a very tongue-in-cheek piece on Halcyon only a couple of days ago.
Thanks.
Thank you! Guess I'm hip with the Greek tragedy. I'll look for your story.
DeleteZeus is a very jealous god. Initially, I thought there must be an aphrodisiac in the shampoo.
ReplyDeleteOoh. An aphrodisiac would have taken this is an entirely different direction. Thanks, Russell.
DeleteThat was cute. Loved the ending. I never got into mythology, but really enjoyed that.
ReplyDeleteI had a literature class in high school that covered Greek mythology. Loved it. Thanks, Shirley.
DeleteWhat a shame and her hair was looking so good too! I'd like to see if it has thickening powers and I promise Zeus I won't say a single word. Thanks,Beth!
ReplyDeleteHa. Need some thickening powers, do you? If only I could bottle and sell that! Thanks.
DeleteNice idea, well written.
ReplyDeleteDear Beth,
ReplyDeleteThis story kind of made me think about a scene from South Pacific. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Zzu8ZxBHMWk
Although Athena's way of washing Apollo out of her hair was a bit more drastic.
Fun piece,
Shalom,
Rochelle
Thanks, Rochelle. Guess I should watch that classic movie some day.
DeleteDear Beth,
ReplyDeleteI like the way you incorporated the mallet into your story. I could see it all happening before my eyes. Well done.
Aloha,
Doug
That means a lot, Doug. Thanks much.
Delete.Aloha
Ah, to sad when lovers turn to stone.
ReplyDeleteYes, indeed. Temptation got them.
DeleteAnother clever twist on the classical. The sculpture invites it. I couldn't resist either! Ann Isik (http://annisik51.wordpress.com)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Ann.Yes, it does invite the classics. I'll hop over to yours soon.
DeleteAh, a little touch of original sin, nicely done.
ReplyDeleteThat's right and thank you. I'll look for yours.
DeleteBeth,
ReplyDeleteNice work...Enjoyed this!
Tom
Thank you, Tom!
DeleteNice! Let's see, Athena never was very interested in fooling around, so maybe she was just as well pleased to turn to stone if it stopped Apollo from being a pest...
ReplyDeleteAnyway, it's a very original take on the prompt, and I like the dialog.
Guess she just wanted to get him out of her hair! Thank you.
DeleteMaybe Apple flavored? Fun.
ReplyDelete